We certainly don't fit the mold of any family I've ever seen but there aren't many portions of our lives that can really be classified as "normal" anyways, so why should this be any different?
My weird ass "Brother" Trever Lee,
Every good story starts at the beginning so, here's a crappy one :
Trever's dead. Don't feel bad - he was pretty unhappy. Plus, there's enough people that feel bad to make up for you letting this one slide. This is mostly Trever's family, but we've always been close and so we kinda just melded. He's the Captain of the Ship and he's responsible for bringing this little motley crew together. Trever died in August of 2013 but we talk about Trever in the present tense. This is because he has made it apparent to us, enough times and in enough ways that if we were to ignore it at this point - we'd be the dicks. And we ain't no dicks!
"How?"
"I don't know."
"What about...?"
Shut up. We don't care about whatever you were going to ask. We don't really care how anyone else feels about this because they don't have to live with us.
I like to think that Trev and I are still partners out here and he mocks me continually.
My weird-ass "Sister" Tiffany:
Tiffany married my brother and now she's my sister. I hated her guts and I swear she smelled like old socks when I first met her but, I like to think Trever whooped her into line(since being a woman she is incapable of having independent thoughts)over time. We live in the same house and have on and off for a year or so now. We split bills, beat Jayla and do all kinds of weird stuff (shut up, before you start) that people in our position don't always do. And, that's fine.
Tiffany's weird but she's alright when she's not being all dumb.
My weird ass "Neice" Jayla :
Jayla is the only girl on this planet (besides Emma Thompson and that chick in Silver Linings Playbook) that I would personally murder anyone, with the exception of Government Officials of rank 10 or above, on this planet for. She's cute and funny and she don't take crap from nobody(were kinda working on that last one). I hope she drops out of high school and then invents a spaceship or something.
I'm not her Dad but I'm there a lot. I sing love songs to her(she hates it), I argue about the importance of Dischord in My Little Pony (He's very undervalued) and I'll probably be the person she calls when she thinks she's pregnant.
I can TOTALLY imagine my life without her. It has more money, less ridiculous fights and screaming and its nowhere near as happy.
Me,
I'm dumb as hell.
So, this is us. I'm not married to Tiff but I live with her and I love her and I'll never date her. Jayla's not my daughter but she thinks (its a fact, don't test it) I'm stronger than anyone on the planet. She can't wait for me to pull up with my loud car and go buy her a stupid ass Skylander.
We don't fall under a demographic.
We're nobody's target audience.
They don't make a stick figure family for us.
But we're family. We always will be. I'm with them and they're with me.
Anyone wants to be involved in our lives - this is what we're all about.
We wouldn't take normal if you paid us.
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